SENDOFFTHE HOUSE
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SIGN INCOMMISSION A TOUR →
001
THE STAG ADMINISTRATION — SINCE 2026
HIS LAST WEEKEND,
RUN PROPERLY.

draft night, the files, fines court, the awards — you commission it, the house does the chasing.

EVERY FINE
£5
GROOM PAYS
£0
DIVISIONS
3
GROOMS LOST
0
COMMISSION A TOUR →
NEXT UP
TOUR 001
COULD BE YOURS
GROOM RIDES FREE
HOUSE POLICY
YOU NEVER CHASE A LAD AGAIN
THE ALBUM OPENS AT TOUR 001
THE FIRST FRAMEreserved
DRAFT NIGHT AWAITS ITS FIRST BROADCAST
THE SEASON OPENS AT TOUR 001
THE RITUALS / CODIFIED
EVERY TOUR RUNS THE FULL LITURGY
RITUAL 01
THE DRAFT
Teams picked live on a broadcast night. The Commissioner holds the cards. Grudges are permanent.
IN STATUTE
RITUAL 02
THE FILES
Passports, deposits, dietaries — asked one at a time, chased by the house until sealed.
IN STATUTE
RITUAL 03
FINES COURT
£5 standard tariff, evidence reviewed nightly, verdicts on the public ledger. The accused gets a say.
IN STATUTE
RITUAL 04
THE CONCIERGE
WhatsApp nudges on a 90-day schedule. Deadlines have teeth. You never personally chase a lad.
IN STATUTE
RITUAL 05
THE AWARDS
A ceremony after: medals, disgraces, sworn quotes, and a plaque for the wall downstairs.
IN STATUTE
switch any of them off if you must. nobody ever has.
THE DIVISIONS — SAME MACHINERY, DIFFERENT LITURGY
ONE HOUSE, THREE CIRCUITS
SAME PRICING IN EVERY DIVISION · BUILT INTO COSTS
STAG DIVISION
OPEN
THE HONOUREDTHE GROOM
THE COURTFINES, £5 TARIFF
THE MONEYTHE KITTY
THE RECORDTHE PRECEDENT DIVISION
the original. every other division inherits its statutes.
COMMISSION A STAG
HEN DIVISION
OPEN
THE HONOUREDTHE BRIDE
THE COURTFINES, SAME TARIFF
THE MONEYTHE KITTY
THE RECORDONE WORD CHANGED
identical machinery. we changed one word.
COMMISSION A HEN DO
CORPORATE DIVISION
ENQUIRIES
THE HONOUREDTHE TEAM, OR THE ONE LEAVING
THE COURTFORFEITS — HR-COMPLIANT
THE MONEYONE CLEAN INVOICE
THE RECORDTHE HOUSE WRITES BACK
fines become forfeits. legal insisted.
WRITE TO THE HOUSE
THE CASE — HEARD AT EVERY WEDDING SINCE
YOU COULD JUST USE THE GROUP CHAT.
EXHIBIT A
RECOVERED FROM A BEST MAN'S PHONE, 2025
DOING IT YOURSELF
UNREAD IN THE CHAT412
LADS WHO "FORGOT" THE DEPOSIT4
PASSPORT PHOTOS THAT WERE A THUMB2
ITINERARY LEAKED TO THE GROOM BYHIS OWN BROTHER
YOU, OUT OF POCKET£1,150
NEVER AGAIN
WITH THE HOUSE — WHAT YOU STOP DOING
✓
The chasing
The concierge asks each lad for one thing at a time on a 90-day schedule, applies the £5 penalty, and escalates to public shaming. Your thumbs never type "any news on that deposit mate?" again.
✓
The money risk
Deposits and instalments split at Money Desk, tracked per lad — and activities split only among who did them. You are never £1,150 out of pocket on trust.
✓
The paperwork
Passports, dietaries, arrivals and draft cards land in one file — exportable in one tap for airlines, villas and go-kart waivers.
✓
The theatre
Draft night broadcast, fines court, the awards. A spreadsheet has never once made a grown man cry with pride.
✓
The secrecy
The groom gets a decoy itinerary. Surprises survive his brother, his phone, and his fiancée.
somebody always ends up doing the admin. the house makes sure it isn't you.
THE SEASON — COMMISSION TO RETIREMENT
NINETY DAYS OF PROCEEDINGS
T–90
YOU, ONCE
The tour is commissioned
Ten minutes: name the groom, set the dates, list the squad. The house takes it from there.
YOU
T–60
BROADCAST
Draft night
Teams drawn live on every phone. The season officially begins.
THE HOUSE
T–30
PAPERWORK
The files close
Every passport, deposit, dietary and draft card sealed — one 90-second ask at a time.
THE HOUSE
T–7
ORDERS
Sealed orders issued
Itinerary, kit list, meet points. The groom's copy is a decoy.
THE HOUSE
T–0
THE WEEKEND
Wheels up
The board, fines court and the arcade travel with you.
THE LADS
T+2
CEREMONY
The awards & retirement
Settlement, medals, one plaque for the wall. The tour is retired.
EVERYONE
— the groom sees none of it until the minibus pulls in.
HOW THE HOUSE EATS
STATUTE 12 · PRICING
OPENING A TOUR£0
ADMIN FEE, ONE-OFF£49
baked into the tour's costs — never your card, never an invoice
PER LAD, PER TOUR£9.77
built into what each lad was paying anyway — nothing to dodge, nothing to opt out of
THE SPLITFLAT
one night or all four — every lad on the manifest carries the same share
EVERYTHING INCLUDED✓
draft broadcast · concierge chasing · awards kit · the decoy — no tiers
THE GROOM'S SEATFREE
the house does not tax the condemned
WORKED — 14 LADS£185.78
14 × £9.77 + £49 admin — £13.27 a head, built into costs, flat for every lad· deposits land in the organiser's own Stripe account · the platform never holds the pot
NEXT UPTOUR 001
COMMISSION A TOUR →
THE HOUSE'S SHARE LIVES INSIDE THE COSTS
ONE PLANALL IN.
NO TIERS.
THE RECORD — EVERY TOUR ENDS ON THIS WALL
RETIRED WITH HONOURS
THE FIRST PLAQUE AWAITS
QUOTES WILL BE TAKEN UNDER OATH AT THE AWARDS
TOUR 001RESERVED
THE WALL OPENS WITH ITS FIRST RETIREMENT
COULD BE YOURS
“the quotes go here. they are taken under oath at the awards, and the house prints them verbatim.”
— THE HOUSE, IN ADVANCE
SENDOFF
SOMEBODY'S BEST MAN HAS TO DO IT. IT'S YOU.
COMMISSION
TOUR 001
COMMISSION A TOUR →ten minutes to open. ninety days of glory.
ALREADY ON A TOUR AND LOST YOUR LINK? →
APPROVED BY
THE COUNCIL
OF BEST MEN
THE SENDOFF · OPERATED BY BUILD SHIELD LTD · brad@thesendoff.co.ukTERMS ARE BEING DRAWN UP — THEY WILL APPLY TO EVERYONE BUT THE GROOM